Giving Thanks

I'm not sure of what punctuation to use for this title. I'm caught between a period, an exclamation mark, and a question mark. Caught? Stuck? Incidentally, I'm on a train. 50MPH max speed. Sometimes required to go only 10MPH. I'm sure there's an allegory in this...

As I look ahead to the week, we're here. We're at Thanksgiving. A time to give thanks for our health, our friends, our families. But my train to the holiday is moving slowly. I'm just not sure when I'll get to my final destination, nor what mood I'll be in when I get there.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm thankful. I really, really am. But I'm so caught up in my present reality -- one that has me fearful and questioning and emotionally taxed. No, I'm not thankful for cancer. And I'm not thankful for what I'm about to go through his holiday season.

But, I am thankful that I have the spirit about me to fight the best way I know how... to schedule next steps, proactively to seek treatment to beat this, to get it out of the way sooner than later. I just want to move on.

Then. Then I'll feel thankful.

What a Week!

Depending on how you look at it, What a Week!

This PAST week, I got my  latest blood work labs back from OSHU. Some good news and some bad news... my TSH levels are at goal! Don't ask me what that stands for, but it's the marker for how the synthetic thyroid hormones are doing. I tested at 3.8 in June and 3.3 in August. The target is 0.1-0.3. I tested at 0.29! I've obviously felt better since I was bumped up to 200mcgs this past round. I wasn't crazy throughout the summer... I do appreciate that validation!

However, the Thyroglobulin levels went from 0.2 in August to 2.4. It's not like they rose to 15, the nurse told me, but any kind of increase is cause for some concern. In short, TG levels could indicate the presence of cancer still in the body. I was also told that my natural antibody level went from 5.8 to 15... so, with the cancer marker going up and with antibodies doing the same thing, my body is obviously still fighting something. I should definitively know in about 6 weeks where we are and what next steps will be.

Speaking of what WILL BE, this NEXT week will be a doozie! First, I commence my first ever Jury Duty on Monday! Yep, first time ever summoned. Such is the draw when you change your address and move to a town. Then, it'll be a Seattle Weekend with the Winter Pineapple Classic on Saturday, a business meeting Sunday morning, and the Seahawks vs. Jets game in the afternoon! I'm thrilled to get to run the race with the likes of some incredible friends, including Jesse, Steph, Mark, Jason, Connie, Loch, Alan, and Thomas.

And I'm thrilled that this PAST week as well as this NEXT one are thoes that demonstrate I'm F*cking Thyroid Cancer, even it it's still thinking there's a fight to fight.